Still boring

The most exciting thing that happened at my OB appointment today (13w5d) is that the bathroom light, apparently on a timer of some sort, shut off just as I started, uh, providing my urine sample. Trying to catch the stream with one hand while frantically groping for the light switch with my other hand provided a nice little adrenaline jolt for the day.

Otherwise, the appointment was totally unremarkable in every way. The doctor (guess I have to come up with a nickname for her, I'll think about it) went over my NT results in a little more detail, and rattled off the long list of things they'd tested me for at my last appointment that were all clear--no syphilis, whoo! Then she whipped out the doppler and, after some searching, found the heartbeat. And yes, this was another fully clothed appointment. Because absolutely nothing has happened in the past month that would warrant me taking my pants off.

I'm finding all this normality confusing but perfectly delightful.

Quick hits

• Thanks for the thoughts on FB pregnancy announcements. Not sure yet how I'll do it but since I'll likely wait until I've had a chance to tell a bunch more people in person, I have a month or so to ponder. I realized that I never had to deal with this before because the last time I was pregnant THERE WAS NO FACEBOOK.

• First trimester screening results came back (am a little miffed that I had to finally call my doctor's office 10 days later and bug them to get the results, but that's another story). All normal, risk level calculated at 1/3321. Exhale.

• Maternity sweatpants. Is there a greater invention? I don't think so.

Coming out

Luckily the past couple of weeks have been pretty busy at work (deadlines) and at home (planning BG's FIFTH birthday party, OMG), so I've had things to take my mind off the fact that it's been a whole week since my NT scan. Not that I'm concerned about the results (which I still haven't gotten called about, BTW)--no, I'm worried about the fact that it's been a whole week since that ultrasound and I've got another week and a half until my next OB appointment. That's TWO AND A HALF WEEKS without a Live Baby Check, people. This may be the longest I've gone without an ultrasound, like, ever.

I was tempted to rent a Doppler--I didn't last time around because I was at the OB's office practically every week, but if I'm going to be all boring and normal this time it might be nice to have some reassurance in these long gaps between appointments before I can actually feel the baby move. But I discovered those things are surprisingly expensive ($40-$50 a month?) and I can't really justify the expense. That's like a month of formula, yo.

So while I bide my time, a question for you all: Is there a way to announce a pregnancy on Facebook that is NOT awful?

I know that ideally, you email or call everyone important personally, and obviously close friends and relatives either will get or have already gotten their own heads-up. But the reality is that there are people in my life who I'd like to share the news with but don't quite merit their own announcement, and Facebook is the logical way to make that happen. Besides, I do generally share photos of BG on FB, and would do so for a new baby too, and to me the only thing that delivers a worse sucker-punch than the unexpected FB pregnancy announcement is the unexpected birth announcement.

So how do you do it without being an asshole? Obviously, NOT like my crunchy home-birthing friend who capped off the announcement of her third pregnancy with the line, "12 weeks and our first midwife appointment tomorrow--can't wait to hear that heartbeat for the first time!" Like, OMG, you announce your pregnancy to everyone you know before you've had a single prenatal appointment? BEFORE YOU HAVE EVEN A SHRED OF CONFIRMATION FROM A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL THAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY PREGNANT?

I tend to think that something simple, with a minimum of gushing and NO belly pictures, is best. Maybe even with a nod (explicit or implied) to what it took to get there. I'm not sure exactly how this paragon of a post would be worded.

I'm fussing over this because, well, to occupy myself for one, but also because I know I have (non-blog) FB friends who are dealing with or have dealt with IF. I have two very close friends, one of whom went through an IVF cycle (her umpteenth, after having a miscarriage last year and losing her first baby a few days after birth the year before) a month or two before I did, and the other had an FET (again, after many, many cycles) a few weeks after I got my positive. Both ended in chemical pregnancies. I told both of them about my pregnancy right away, so they wouldn't be shocked by the news, but I know it will still hurt for them to see the news out in public. I have another FB friend, a work colleague whom I'm not super close with (not close enough to email her personally with the news), who I'm 99% sure did an IVF cycle last fall--we were talking about some work scheduling and she had two "procedures" five days apart, bed rest after the second one, and has made frequent references to her acupuncturist. And another, a single-mom-by-choice who spent a long, heartbreaking time trying, unsuccessfully, to conceive a second child.

I don't want to hurt these people, and the countless others who may be struggling in silence. But I don't want to deprive myself of some well-deserved joy and celebration, either.

Have you ever seen a FB pregnancy announcement that was handled well? What made it not painful and/or not-assholish?

Boring

Today was my first-trimester screening. My husband came along, both for support and because he hasn't had a chance to be at any of the ultrasounds I've had so far. The NT scan was uneventful, though I will seriously never get over the sight of that baby bobbing and bouncing on the screen, its little heart pumping away. NT measurement was 0.96 mm, which Dr. Google assures me is excellent for 11w2d. We won't get the full screening results for a week or so, after they get the blood test results back, but I feel pretty good after that ultrasound.

By the way, the blood test? It was a finger prick, and I can confidently say that it was the single most painful bloodletting I've ever experienced. And that's as someone who has had approximately 84,792 vials of blood taken in the last year alone. My fingertip is still throbbing. And they don't just prick the finger (with what feels like a blunt letter opener), they PUMP it five separate times to get five little blotches of blood! Couldn't I just roll up my sleeve instead?

*****

We told Bat Girl about the baby at Christmas. It took her a little while to absorb the news, but she's super excited now. She loves reading the "I'm Going to Be a Big Sister" book we got her, and she's been telling everyone about the new baby, including her whole class, the office staff at her school, and the lady who assessed her for next year's kindergarten gifted & talented program this weekend.

This is going to sound really crass, but my husband and I had really been hoping for another girl. BG, too, wanted a baby sister. But a week or two ago, I started getting a really strong feeling that this baby might be a boy--and feeling that that would be OK. I happened to ask BG last week if she thought the baby was a boy or a girl, and she said immediately, "I think it's a boy." And today after the ultrasound, my husband turned to me and said, "That's a boy. I know it."

We've got another 7 weeks until the big anatomy scan when we (hopefully) find out for sure. BTW, when I was pregnant with BG, I had a very strong feeling very early on that she was a girl. I don't claim to be particularly intuitive, but I was very, very sure, so this should be interesting.

*****

I'm also pretty sure this is a super boring blog post. But I'm enjoying being very boring in this pregnancy so far, especially given that by this point in my pregnancy with Bat Girl, I'd already had half a dozen bleeding episodes, including a bright red scary one resulting in an emergency trip to L&D. Today, I even got to keep my pants on for the ENTIRE APPOINTMENT. I KNOW!!!! I haven't had a doctor's appointment where I got to keep my pants on for over a year!

Right now my biggest worries are trying to find enough food that doesn't nauseate me and trying to find clothing that fits yet doesn't make me look hugely pregnant. I'm waiting until 14 weeks to tell at work, which is when we'll have just passed a major round of deadlines. And that waiting, too, feels like a luxury (though I'm totally eager to spill), since last time around I ended up telling my boss at 11 weeks because I had to go on bedrest for a week.

If I end up being one of those tedious bloggers who logs in once every 4 or 5 weeks to share some dull minutiae of my totally normal pregnancy and has nothing important or meaningful to say about fear, letting go of infertility, or coming to grips with anxiety...well, I'll consider that a blessing.